Film Review: The 'bots are back and are crushing plotlines
Credible plotting crushed under the relentless mechanism of machines run amok
"Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen" is tinnitus with pictures. It's like sticking your face inside an electric can opener and your finger in a wall socket. And those are the good parts.
It's appropriate that one of the major action set pieces involves the trashing of a library. As the walls explode, the shelves tumble and the books are shredded into confetti, like something out of Ray Bradbury's worst nightmare, you may realize that "Revenge of the Fallen" -- a sequel to the 2007 mega-hit "Transformers" -- is moviemaking aimed at a postliterate generation by filmmakers too contemptuous of their audience to be bothered with such fusty traditions as story logic and narrative coherence.
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"Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen" stars Megan Fox, Shia LaBeouf, Rainn Wilson, Hugo Weaving and John Turturro in a Paramount/Dreamworks release. Rated PG-13 for intense sequences of sci-fi action violence, language, some crude and sexual material, and brief drug use. Watch »
Paramount Pictures
TOP: Megan Fox and Shia LaBeouf escape the wrath of the machines in a scene from "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen." BOTTOM: Optimus Prime storms and stomps through a city in Michael Bay's demolition fest.
Paramount Pictures
Wheelbot joins in the mechanized battle royal in "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen," follow-up to the original "Transformers" but with far less positive energy.
Rated PG-13 for intense sequences of sci-fi action violence, language, some crude and sexual material, and brief drug use
Length: 150 minutes
Released: June 24, 2009 NationwideScore: 3.0
Cast: Megan Fox, Shia LaBeouf, Rainn Wilson, Hugo Weaving, John Turturro
Director: Michael BayProducer: Ian Bryce, Tom DeSanto, Lorenzo di Bonaventura
Writer: Ehren Kruger, Roberto Orci, Alex Kurtzman
Genre: Action/Adventure, Suspense/Thriller, SciFi/Fantasy
Distributor: Paramount/Dreamworks
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But as the project's defenders would argue, what can one expect from a movie that ends with the following disclaimer: "Based on Hasbro's Transformers Action Figures."
For all its metal-crunching, rock-'em-sock-'em robot mayhem and computer-generated state-of-the-art special effects, the first "Transformers" was old-fashioned at its core. It was basically a boy-and-his-dog story updated for the plugged-in sci-fi/Wi-Fi generation -- "Timmy and Lassie," if Lassie were a giant Swiss army knife.
In "Revenge of the Fallen," the boy, Sam Witwicky (Shia LaBeouf), is headed for college, hoping for a "normal" life that has no room for his "dog," faithful Bumblebee, a giant transforming Autobot.
"Bee," as the mechanical being is nicknamed, has lived in the Witwicky garage, in the guise of a Chevrolet Camaro, since the first movie, which revealed that rival gangs of outer-space robots known as Transformers -- benevolent Autobots and evil Decepticons -- had come to Earth and assumed the form of cars, trucks, motorcycles, toasters and cell phones, to exist among us in secrecy.
During his first days in college, Sam has to cope with the wisecracks of a smarmy astronomy professor (Rainn Wilson) and the sexual come-ons of the only woman (Isabel Lucas) in North America who may be hotter than his back-home girlfriend (Tennessee-born Megan Fox). A greater challenge is the attack of the Decepticons, who hope to retrieve some secret information that has been implanted
into Sam's brain so they can restore power to their ancient leader, a pharaonic-looking robot with a satanic name, The Fallen.
The Decepticons also wreak Godzilla-sized havoc on land (Shanghai, in particular), sea and air, yet somehow the governments of the world manage to keep the robots' existence secret, despite the suspicions of such Internet conspiracy theorists as Sam's college roomie (Ramon Rodriguez).
After many skirmishes and much talk of destiny, "the AllSpark" and "the Matrix of Leadership," the action climaxes in Egypt with a battle royale among the pyramids that brings together most of the key characters (flesh or metal), including John Turturro as an ex-secret agent seeking redemption and Kevin Dunn and Julie White as Sam's beleaguered parents. (These three actors -- and LaBeouf, too -- bring a great deal of very welcome humor and humanity to their roles.)
There's no denying that the Transformers are cool to look at, as they stretch and expand or collapse and fold -- like tin origami -- into crazy, lethal-looking metal monsters that can smash through buildings, trees and aircraft carriers. "Revenge of the Fallen," which opened Wednesday, is a marvel of high-tech know-how. Kids who consider themselves too old for the less grandiose engineering entertainment provided by Bob the Builder and Thomas the Tank Engine should love it, even if its 150-minute length is almost certain to numb adult butts as well as ears.
However, the disconnect between the scary hyper-realism of the in-your-face effects and the juvenile, even infantile and cartoonish content of the story and gags (a robot farts out a parachute) is unnerving. Also objectionable is the hypocrisy of the filmmakers, who apparently want a pass for the project's frequent inanity on the theory that this is "only" an action movie, yet want audiences to take it to heart when a major character appears to be killed. "We shed blood, sweat and metal together," one noble human soldier says of his metallic alloy, er, ally.
Of course, thoughtfulness has never been one of director Michael Bay's virtues; noise and explosions and the hardware that creates them are his specialties. Returning from the first "Transformers" and from such previous spectacles as "Armageddon" and "Pearl Harbor," Bay apparently never met a weapon he didn't like. His movies are so militaristic they can induce shudders in those who don't think blowing things up is the best solution to a problem.
Is "Revenge of the Fallen" -- in which the destruction of a U.S.-occupied desert village is acceptable collateral damage in the battle against the terrorist Decepticons -- an apologia for the Iraq War? (According to some reviewers, one Decepticon shouts "Jihad!" during a battle.) The only character other than the mean robots crafted to earn the audience's hate is a weasely presidential spokesman and National Security advisor, who tells some skeptical generals they should try "diplomatic options" if the alternative allows, for example, the destruction of downtown Shanghai (an event that doesn't seem to bother many of the Americans here). I figured this peacemonger worked for a fictional movie president, but later we hear a television report that "President Obama" has been whisked into hiding. So among the other lessons this "Transformers" sequel delivers is that the president is a coward and appeaser who can't be trusted with national security matters.
Also troubling is the introduction of a pair of rambunctious comic-relief Autobots named Skids and Mudflap, although the monikers "Amos and Andy" might be more appropriate. Apparently useful only for menial physical duties, these robots are given bucktoothed, goofy faces, speak in exaggerated, jive-talking African-American accents, and are, we learn, illiterate. Why would Bay and his collaborators -- with millions and millions of dollars at their disposal, and with what may be the biggest movie audience of the year waiting for their film -- go to so much trouble and expense to aim so low?
-- John Beifuss: 529-2394
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